How to give support
Responding to a disclosure
At UVic, everyone needs to be prepared to be part of the conversation about how to prevent and respond to sexualized violence. How you respond to a disclosure can have a significant impact on what a survivor does next.
Responding in a non-judgmental way, prioritizing the safety of those impacted by sexualized violence, and providing options and choices on what to do next will help to avoid re-traumatizing or re-victimizing someone who has disclosed to you. Respecting and honouring survivor's choices are ways we can be and .
While it can be hard to know what to say and what to do when someone discloses, just remember that it takes COURAGE to disclose and therefore we owe it to survivors to respond appropriately.
Receiving a disclosure can be difficult
It is okay not to know what to say when someone discloses to you. If you need additional information on how to receive a disclosure, consider taking a workshop.
Following a disclosure, you might also need support. It can be hard hearing about someone else’s painful or difficult experience. You might feel awkward or helpless and it may trigger a difficult experience from your own life. Feel free to reach out to the SVRO or any of the other on-campus or off-campus supports if you feel impacted.
Supporting a friend accused of sexualized violence
You can:
- learn about consent and sexualized violence
- provide a safe space for honest feelings; support your friend while holding them accountable
- be mindful of privacy—don’t share their story without consent
- be honest about the support you can give or help them explore options
- direct them to campus or community resources
- take care of your own wellbeing and seek support if needed
What NOT to do:
- don’t blame the survivor—it’s never their fault
- don’t assume what your friend needs—ask them
- don’t rely on your friend to manage your feelings
- don’t break trust by sharing the story without consent